1. Alden Ehrenreich was properly great.
His character was the most genuine part of the entire thing, right up with Llewyn Davis and Marge Gunderson in terms of heartfelt Coen characters. And the scene he shared with Ralph Fiennes - complete with an expertly-timed hand whip - is probably the funniest thing I'll see all year.
2. Was the plodding structure intentional?
Was it supposed to be about the frivolity of Hollywood entertainment, about killing time?
3. If it's intentional, then does it make Hail, Caesar! worse or better?
There were quite a few moments where I was bored. Surely, then, the comedy wasn't good enough?
4. The comedy wasn't good enough.
For every great bit, there was a bit that was only so-so. Why was Jonah Hill there? Tilda Swinton only hinted at being funny. Where were the gags?
5. Why did the storylines fizzle out so noticeably?
Scarlett Johannson showed promise, then disappeared. So did Frances McDormand.
6. Am I just being a grumpy bugger?
No.
7. At least it showed that most movies made in the 50s were a bit shit.
And the homoerotic undertones-made-overtones of the sailor sequence were properly funny.
8. I'm still getting over the fact that Alden Ehrenreich was so good in this film.
The scenes with him taking his co-star on a date were so sweet. And that lasso work! Hot damn.
Oh yeah, here's an updated version of my Scale of Coen™:
1. Miller's Crossing
2. Fargo
3. Inside Llewyn Davis
4. No Country for Old Men
5. The Man Who Wasn't There
6. The Big Lebowski
7. Blood Simple
8. Barton Fink
9. True Grit
10. Raising Arizona
11. A Serious Man
12. Hail, Caesar!
13. Burn After Reading
14. The Hudsucker Proxy
15. O Brother, Where Art Thou?
16. Intolerable Cruelty
17. The Ladykillers
